By Amanda Grossman-Scott
A quick search for Halloween costumes for girls reveals, well, too much. I have two daughters and I want them to have fun dressing up for Halloween. So why do I feel like nearly every costume I see is too tight, too short, too low or too grown up? And how do I explain to my daughters why costumes which are sized for them are just not appropriate?
In my effort to raise media savvy children, I’ve taught them to question all the media they see. I ask them questions when we watch TV and movies together. When it comes to appearance, I’ll ask questions like, “how can she move in that tight costume?” and “how does her hair still look perfect after that battle?” and “why does he get to wear pants while fighting crime but she doesn’t?”
I have been rewarded with children who can think for themselves. But kids are kids and they are still interested in pop culture and still like pretending. So I’m taking advantage of this opportunity to have some good conversations with my kids about media and the standards we set for ourselves.
When choosing a costume, I like to ask my kids these 6 questions.
- Is your costume realistic or a fantasy? Knowing the difference between fantasy and reality is something we as adults take for granted—for children this is not always apparent. Help your child to figure if their costume is something real (doctor, nurse, police officer, firefighter) or something that is imaginary (monster, super hero, wizard). This is a good way to help avoid scary run-ins with fellow trick-or-treaters and possibly nightmares later.
- Is your costume a role model or someone you would like to emulate? After the Olympics this summer, my kids were excited about the sports they’d seen. When it was time to pick a costume, I encouraged them to think about the athletes they’d come to admire. The people in their lives who are doing good things like soldiers, firefighters and ambulance drivers are a great place to find inspiration as well.
- Is your costume age appropriate? If your child’s costume involves liquor, drugs or smoking, or is too revealing, then it isn’t age appropriate. If this is the kind of costume your child is looking for, you may want to explore why. This is an excellent chance to explain why some content (and costumes) are not appropriate for children and suggest alternatives.
- What does your costume tell others about you? Does your child aspire to be a doctor, athlete or racecar driver? Do they love music or animals or protecting people or taking care of others? Encouraging your child to dress up as something he or she aspires to be can help inspire a costume choice that’s as unique as your child. How about a zookeeper, veterinarian or alligator wrangler for an animal lover? Police officer, doctor, teacher, and nurse are all great costumes as well as future careers!
- How does your costume make you feel? Does your child feel good about him or herself while wearing the costume? Or do they feel uncomfortable? If your child is dressed as a fictional character like a princess or a superhero, encourage your child to consider why he or she might not look exactly like the TV or movie character (because no one looks like that in real life!) and that it is great that everyone has their own unique look and shape.
- Does your costume give you an opportunity to be creative? In the best of times, Halloween can encourage our kids to be creative, use imagination and create memories. It doesn’t have to be time consuming or expensive. Create a washing machine costume out of boxes. Use soda bottles to create a jet pack. Or toilet paper to make a mummy. The time you spend with your child and the chance you’re giving him or her to be creative will be well worth the effort.
Using everyday (and holiday!) opportunities to discuss media and body image is a fantastic way to start talking about the images your child is exposed to every day. Help your child to make good choices that reflect well on who they are and what they are interested in. It will help them figure out who they want to become in the future.
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Great lessons, quick and simple discussions.Amanda Grossman-Scott is Executive Director Educate and Empower Kids. She has written for various magazines, newspapers and blogs and has been active in the journalism industry intermittently for the last 15 years. She studied Journalism and Communications. Amanda is from Lancaster, Pennsylvania and now lives with her husband and four children in San Antonio, Texas.
